A Time to Remember 9/11

Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, 

neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with 

thee whithersoever thou goest. ~Joshua 1:9

Where were you? This is a question that always comes up on this day, as we remember what happened. Anyone old enough to have been aware of what was going on 12 years ago on this day knows where they were and what they were doing. We don't have to write it down to remember because it is ingrained in our minds forever. I was working for a non-profit at the time. Our office happened to be in a federal building. We heard about the first tower on the radio, then shortly after the second plane hit. We were stunned. It didn't seem real. Our building was evacuated for precautionary reasons and I remember spending the rest of the day at home, glued to the tv, watching events unfold. 

The events of that day changed things in our country forever. A terrorist attack on our own soil is something we need to never forget. We need to remember that there are individuals and groups out there that hate America, hate Americans. This is not some conspiracy theory, its the truth. As we read the headlines in the news the past couple of weeks it would seem as though some have forgotten what happened to America that day and who did it to us. Our country and our leaders need so much prayer for wisdom as they make decisions that affect us all, but more importantly affect our military.

What would our country be like without a military? What would happen if we did not have individuals willing to serve? I don't even want to know what it would be like. We are blessed to have the military we do, we are so fortunate to have the many who are willing to serve sacrificially. Imagine if parents refused to support their child joining the military or if our children refused to serve? I am truly so thankful for our service men and woman and their families who have given their lives for my freedom and the freedom of my children. I don't know what my kids are going to grow up to be or do with their lives. The only hope I have for them is that they are faithful to God in whatever they feel he is leading them to do. If that is to join the military then I will support them in that choice and be so proud of them. The Bible gives us many examples of honorable men who served God as military men. We needed men of courage and honor then and we need them now. 

Our prayers today are with those who lost loved ones on September 11 and they are also with those who give of themselves to keep us safe every day whether it be in the military or as a first responder. The Cyr family thanks you and we will not forget your sacrifice!

A Time to Feel Like a Vending Machine

I'm convinced whoever coined the phrase, "after 3 it's just one more", never had more than 3 kids! Because let me tell you, it may seem to everyone else that it is "just one more", but to the parents raising, "just one more", one more is a lot! People say this to me all the time. And it's not usually woman of families with 5 or more kids saying it to me. It's just about always from moms or 2 or 3. So because I am asked this a lot, and I so don't feel that statement is accurate, I ponder on it quite a bit.I'm trying to find the accuracy in the statement as it relates to my life and I just can't. Let me tell you why...

First of all. If you have 1 child think about all the work, time, energy, effort that goes into raising that 1 child. Okay now multiply it by 2. I remember thinking how tough it was to juggle everything when I had my second. Figuring out schedules and nap times, etc. All my work was suddenly doubled. Okay, now put yourself in my shoes. All the work of raising 1 child and multiply that by 7. See how when you look at it from my perspective, it's not "just one more". It is the needs, wants, desires of one child multiplied 7 times. Seven behaviors to train and mold. The demands are never ending...and I seriously mean that. Don't misunderstand me. These are demands I cherish (most of the time) and that I consider to be blessings. This is not me complaining that there are so many needs to meet. While the needs are overwhelming and do get the best of me at times, I feel incredibly blessed that God has allowed me 7 little persons needs to meet. That being said...it's a lot and it definitely does not feel like, "just one more". A whole new person brings with it a whole new life of needs and wants that you have to meet. And with only one mom and one dad we are slightly outnumbered. A friend who has 5 teenagers once said to me a few years ago, "don't you feel like a vending machine". She went on to explain to me that is how she felt when her kids were younger. At the time I honestly didn't understand what she meant and could not relate to the analogy. Most likely because at the time the 4 I had were very young, most non-verbal. Now I completely understand and it's the most accurate analogy I can think of. Little people are constantly asking for something...I mean ALWAYS. My kids can attest to me saying at least once a day, "stop asking me for things!". 
Those of you with 3 or less children, think of the times when you have to switch over closets and what a daunting task that is to do with even 1 child. Multiply it by 7. Think of school shopping. Supplies get expensive when you are buying for 1 or 2. Multiply that by 7. If you have 3 little mouths to feed and know your budget takes a hit due to the amount of food you have to buy...multiply that by 7. Don't even get me started on clothes shopping! You can

understand maybe why second-hand stores are our best friends! Think to the future...1 or 2 to put through college...multiply that by 7. I think I've made my point. None of this is to say that we are worried in any way about providing for these kids. We know God will provide and we also in no way ever complain that we have to feed, clothe and educate 7 kids. Truly if given the chance to do things differently we certainly would not. This is all to try and prove my point that the phrase, "its just one more", is not really that accurate.I'm not saying that raising 7 is harder than raising 3, I'm simply saying that it's not "just one more". Not to us anyway! And maybe that is because my kids are all still little. I'm sure once they are all teenagers I won't feel like a vending machine as much because they will be able to do most of these things on their own. 
How do I attempt to not let the demands of raising so many little ones get the better of me. Well I cannot say I do this consistently...especially in the last few months but for me it comes down to perspective. Putting things into perspective has a way of clearing the fog and allowing me to focus on the things that matter. It's not always going to be like this. Like so many have reminded me lately...it goes by so quickly. Before you know it they are grown up! I already have a 9 year old and I can't tell you how it happened. It went by so fast! Taking the time to see the blessings in the demands helps me to not drown in the many tasks before me right now. This is a season and its a season God wants me to find joy in, which I do majority of the time. And my times of greatest clarity, perspective, and joy come when I've been faithful in spending time in Gods word. There is no denying the power it has to bring peace to my soul. 
So there it is, my perspective on a phrase that has irked me lately! You may find a mom with a lot of kids who disagrees, actually I'm sure you can, but for us, "just one more" sounds more like, "ONE MORE!". But we always rejoice in our "ONE MORE!". 

A Time to Adjust

The Lord will give strength unto his people; the Lord will bless his 

people with peace. ~Psalm 29:11

Emma Michelle has made her arrival and not a moment too soon. Weighing in at 10lbs, 10 oz I was thankful she came a little over 3 weeks early! All the kids were so excited to meet her and beg me all the time if they can hold her. We are certainly feeling blessed. 

But you know, blessed isn't the only thing we are feeling. We are feeling outnumbered, overwhelmed, tired, and weak. Does this surprise you? People keep asking us how things are going, or how we are doing and then seem surprised when we don't say that things are going excellent and we've got this all under control! I realize you expect that with baby 7 things are old hat to us but really this has been a rather hard adjustment.The fact that we have two babies in the house is a big factor in our feeling like we don't have this under control. Tess is still a baby at 10 months so we have two to give bottles to and feed and two who don't walk, and two who can't verbalize their needs and two who can't really do anything on their own yet. Not to mention the other 5 that still need us for things! This is a new experience for us and the closest to having twins either of us ever wants to be! Before this our closest two were 14 months apart and honestly that was nothing compared to this! Of course if God had ever seen fit to bless us with twins we would have been happy but right now, we are glad they have come one at a time! We are relying on Gods grace and strength to get us through each day and we know He will...this is just going to take some time!

My Irish Twins-10 months apart!

Emma is also dealing with jaundice. They did discharge her from the hospital because her numbers were borderline at the time so we were told to keep an eye on her. Yesterday at her check up her numbers had gone up into a zone that could present some dangers. So we had more lab work done this morning to see if her numbers went down...but they didn't. The went up. If her number gets to 20 she will have to be hospitalized and put under the bili lights. This morning she is at 17. So we have been told to keep doing what we are doing which is feeding her every 2hrs (or less if she wants...yes, exhausting!) and having her sleep in the sun. Please pray that her numbers would decrease without the need to be hospitalized. We are thankful that she doesn't present any of the other symptoms associated with jaundiced such as being lethargic and not wanting to eat. Those are danger signs that we need to be keeping an eye out for. Otherwise for a premie she is doing great. The Dr's are really happy with how she looks and we are so thankful!

There are so many things I am thankful for in regards to Emma's pregnancy and delivery.My health is one of them. Up until a couple weeks ago my blood pressure and sugars remained right where they needed to be and I know that was the power of all your prayers at work. My BP took a turn for the worst last week. I was put on "bed rest" but realistically we all knew that was impossible so I was to do as little as possible and not leave the house unless I absolutely had to. Even with doing those things and resting as much as I could my BP still got dangerously high. I was sent to the hospital a couple times to be monitored when the decision was finally made the best thing for me health wise was to induce me and deliver the baby to get my blood pressure down. We saw Gods hand in this delivery everywhere we looked. That day the Dewhurst family, whose daughters have been babysitting for us lately, were able to come and watch the kids for us since we had no child care. They arrived in lightening speed and even spent the night so Ben could stay with me at the hospital after I delivered! We are so grateful to them! Also, when you've delivered as many babies as I have at the same hospital ( a small hospital) the nurses come to know you very well and we know the nurses well. I have my favorite nurse. I have loved her since she helped deliver Gabe and then Will. She was the nurse on duty that day and I was so thrilled. She's amazing! And the icing on the cake was that my favorite Dr., the one I request to only be seen by, happened to be on call and delivered Emma. I was on cloud 9 really with my medical team! It doesn't hurt my Dr. is originally from Madawaska! God just blessed over and above. My blood pressure remains stable, not great, but not terribly high so I don't need to be on meds this time around and we are praising God for that. 

So long story short we are all doing well, we are happy and blessed but also tired and overwhelmed. All the meals our friends are providing are a saving grace right now, we are so blessed by wonderful friends. Bear with us as we slip off the radar for a few months and get to know our new addition and adjust to life as we know it now! Your prayers and love and support mean so much...we know how blessed we are!

Our 7 amazing kids!

A Time to Get out of the House with Little People

I am asked often how I manage to run my errands with all the kids. I constantly hear, "I don't know how you do it". I actually don't think twice about it anymore because it has been a way of life for so long but, to those that do wonder, I thought I'd fill you in on some of my tips and tricks that make going out manageable. 

I will say I have it easier now than I did in the beginning. When Jena was born I had 5 kids, ages 5 and under so those days were more challenging than they are now. With 3 kids in school, getting out of the house is "easy" during the school year. Although in a few short weeks I will again have 4 kids, 4 and under at home so the challenges will be there still as far as getting out of the house goes. Thankfully I have had a lot of practice over the years so the thought of it isn't nearly as daunting as it used to be. The following are things I do to make being in public manageable and I don't think you have to have 4 or 5 kids to implement this. These are all things I also did when I had 1 or 2. 

1. Train them at Home: This is really important. If you don't expect obedience at home, don't expect it from them in public. Take the time to teach them to obey right away, all the way and with a happy heart! When they are playing outside in the yard is a great time. Teaching them not to stray and obeying boundaries at home will help you while you are out. Generally speaking, if they are in the habit of obeying you at home they will be able to do it in public.  I always cringe when I see a kid run away from their mom. It may seem harmless when it happens in the yard but change the scenery and this is happening in a parking lot and it's an accident waiting to happen. 

2. Have a plan: Ok yes, by nature I am a planner. I plan everything and feel passionately that plans are good, necessary and bring order to the world. I also understand that we are not all made this way. Some of you can wake up in the morning not having a clue what you will do, what you will eat, what you will clean and it works for you. That's great. But when it comes to having multiple little ones to get in and out of a vehicle in a busy or even non-busy parking lot you NEED a plan if you want to keep everyone safe. Hopefully if you've done tip #1, you aren't too worried. I teach ALL my kids, yes even my 8 & 9 year old to keep one hand on our vehicle as I am getting them out one by one. No one is allowed to walk around the car, run off, etc. They have to stand still keeping one hand on our vehicle. If your child has a hard time obeying then practice this in the driveway at home and then test it out in a parking lot you know is safe and not busy. I also park next to the cart return, when possible so that the ones that are going in the cart can be set in it right away and it also makes getting into the store and returning the cart easier. When it's not possible and I have to wait till I get in the store to get a cart then I delegate one little to each of the older two boys. They have to hold their hand as we walk into the store and usually I have a couple I'm carrying, or helping into the store. 

3. State expectations clearly: Don't assume that your children know what good behavior is. Make sure they know and understand what your expectations are. Expectations will vary from errand to errand sometimes. I usually take a couple minutes before we arrive to our destination to remind them what I expect of them, what they will do while we are there and what responsibilities, if any, I have for them. The Dr.'s office is a tougher one for me than the grocery store. At least at the grocery store they are walking around (most of them) and moving. At a Dr.'s office there is a lot of sitting and waiting and that is understandably hard for most kids. But they CAN do it so again, practice at home if you have to. I have in the past set a timer and made my kids sit and read a book without moving or talking till the timer went off. Don't expect perfection but do expect a decent effort. I have some that sitting still is not a problem and who needed very little training. Then there are others who just can't seem to sit still for more than 2 minutes no matter how much training they get. If I see them making an honest effort to obey that is when I am pleased. As they age you can raise your expectations but its important to be realistic and understand that not all kids are the same. 

4. Be Prepared: This pregnancy I have been seen weekly by my OB from the very beginning, which means we have spent A LOT of time in the Dr's office. The nurses and Dr.'s are amazed at how well my kids do and comment about it often. And honestly sometimes I'm even amazed! But I do go prepared. With my OB I cannot always plan my appts. at times that are good for our schedule. Because I am there weekly, I have to take the time I can get and sometimes that has meant in the middle of nap time or lunch time. I bring snacks if I have to, I bring my ipad if I have to. I don't typically allow the kids electronics in the Dr.s office because I feel they should be able to sit quietly and talk with each other or read books without needing electronics to behave and be quiet. But when I know we will be there during a difficult time of day then I do allow it. When I do have more control over when a Dr. appt. will be like our well-child visits for example, then I am mindful to choose a time that fits in with our schedule well so that it's not interfering with nap time or meal time. That usually means I am at the pediatrician early in the morning. 

5. Balance Rewards and Consequences: Don't expect your kids to obey and meet your expectations if there are no consequences for not doing it. At the same time, be reasonable. Some errands are more difficult on kids than others and understanding that and being willing to reward good behavior in those times will go a long way. I don't reward good behavior for the errands that are a part of our everyday life like grocery shopping or well-child visits. Although on a side note. When we are at the grocery store my kids LOVE going to see the lobsters in the tank. It takes extra time, sometimes time I don't have but it is a nice incentive for them to behave. If they've been behaving then when we get to the tank we stop for 5 or so minutes so they can watch them. But during those time when it's an errand that is out of the norm and may be more challenging for the kids then tell them in advance that if they behave and meet your (reasonable) expectations then they will be rewarded. Recently we had a Dr. appt. at Noah's cardiologist. This is not your typical Dr. appt. as it's very long...2-3 hrs long to be exact. I had all 6 kids with me. They did fantastic and they were rewarded. Always follow through with your rewards and consequences. 

These are ways that have helped our family manage out of the house with all the kids. The more you do it the easier it gets. There will be kinks to work out in the beginning and there will be those days where they just don't want to cooperate. It happens! Don't get discouraged or think you're doing something wrong. Try again next time!

A Time to look Outward

Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, 

even as also ye do. ~I Thess.5:11

Earlier this spring I wanted to come up with a way we, as a family, could reach out and minister to some folks in our church. I wanted it to be an activity that would be a blessing to not only the receiver but also us, in particular the kids. In this season of life many things we would love to do are challenging things to do. I wanted whatever we decided on to be something that was easy enough so that we would have the desire to continue with it and not look at the activity as a chore. 

What we came up with has been a really great activity and so I want to share it with you. As a family we committed to praying for and writing/drawing cards and letters of encouragement to one person each in the church throughout the summer. With no suggestions or prodding from Ben and I each of the kids, including Jena, chose one person who is in our church to write to. Ben and I also did this. The kids made their own cards and those that could write a letter did that as well, letting the person know how they were praying for them. Often Jena would pick a picture from one of her coloring books to color for her person. The response we have received from those getting our cards has been awesome. But what I love most about this activity is that it has been a way for our kids to feel more connected with people in our church and remind them that God can use them too to be a blessing and encouragement to others.

My kids would never have come up with this idea on their own. But once the idea was

established and we began putting this plan into action I did not have to force them or convince them to do this. They were very excited when the time came to sit at the table and make their cards...this was a blessing to my heart. They have also been so mindful to pray for their person. They all take turns at dinner time praying and each time they have not forgotten to include their person in their prayers. 

We are so glad we made the decision to do this and I do believe this is something that will become a summer tradition of ours. Soon enough even Tess will be joining in!

A Time to Get Some Help Around Here!

I don't have to tell you how overwhelming it can feel when house work, yard work and laundry all pile up! Whether you have no children or 10, everyone falls behind and everyone feels like the work that needs to get done around the house is too much for one person. I feel like that pretty much on a daily basis. It can be very discouraging to spend a few hours cleaning only to have it look like you didn't do anything 10 minutes later because 6 kids make a lot of mess! 

Now that we have "older kids" we have the benefit of help around the house. We don't HAVE to do it all. Part of raising kids is teaching them. Teaching them to not only work hard but how to do that work by having them work beside you. It takes a lot of time and and patience on the parents part to train kids how to do things before they get to a point where they are able to do it on their own. But in the end every parent who does it will tell you it is worth the effort. Not only for the extra help it gives us but for the character it instills in the kids.

 My kids are normal kids...they would much rather play then work. Sometimes there is something we are doing that they want to help with and get excited about but a lot of times we have to force them to help. Whining to get out of work is not tolerated and neither is complaining about the work. Teach your kids to do everything with a happy heart because in the real world there are a lot of things they will have to do that they won't like and is there anything more annoying than a whiny and complaining adult who refuses to work?! Start them young!
All the kids (except Tess of course) have their nightly chore. Noah sweeps, Owen washes the table, Gabe washes the chairs (kids get chairs SOOO dirty, I had no idea!), Will sets the table for dinner and Jena picks up the toys on the main floor before bed. This is what is expected of them nightly. Once a week they have to bring down their laundry, except Jena because she's too little to carry it down, and they have to tidy up their rooms. And no, they do not get an allowance for this. Everyone has their different opinion on this and you have to do what works for you but our opinion is that they are a part of this family and need to pitch in without expecting a reward in return. 

Then there are the extras. Things that we ask them to do when there is down time, a rainy

day or we just need the extra help. For example today it was raining and they spent a lot of the morning watching a movie and playing their DS. So I put the boys to work in the afternoon while the girls napped. They had to wash down all the walls throughout the house. This is something I like to do a couple times a year. Gabe even did all my kitchen cupboards! Just give them a bucket of water with some pine sol and some rags and they are good to go. It's an easy task and one that I particularly appreciate having get done. Now don't think I sat back and watched. I was washing the floors while they did this. The best way to teach your kids to have a good work ethic is to lead by example. If you just sit back and watch them work while you delegate they will learn to resent work and likely, you too. 
Jena has always loved helping to unload and load the dishwasher. She started this when she was 2. I keep my dishes in a lower cupboard so the kids CAN help with this and with setting the table. Everything they need is in their reach. She is super at doing this job and more than capable. Of course the boys are able to help with this too and they do sometimes. We also have them help with yard work. The other day all of us went out and weeded my flower gardens. Ben taught Gabe to safely use clippers so now he loves to clear the borders of our rock walls of unwanted small trees and weeds. One of the big jobs we have that Ben has taught Noah and Owen is piling wood. We heat with wood so every year there is wood to be piled. Last fall the two of them piled 3 chords of wood by themselves and they did a great job! Ben did pay them for this because it was a big help to him, they worked everyday after school till the job was done and they did with a happy heart. 
These are just some examples of how we have been teaching the kids to work. Are there

times we get frustrated? Yes! Are there times we think we could do it faster if they were just off playing? Yes! But we know the time we are investing in them now will only be a benefit to them in the future. I encourage you if you have not yet started training your kids to work to do so now! You will not regret it! 

A Time for a Public Service Announcement!

I don't often rant or complain but the following advice I feel will be most helpful. If not for you, then for me! I'm really not sure when the following questions became appropriate in our society but after 7 pregnancies and conversations with friends who have been pregnant I realize these are common occurrences (though some questions only happen after you reach a certain number) and I feel I have a responsibility to inform the public on their inappropriateness.

1. Can I rub your belly?

If you would not ask a woman who isn't pregnant to touch her why would you think it's ok to ask a pregnant woman? Honestly it has never tempted me to touch a pregnant woman's belly...EVER. I do not understand some people's fascination with this. Maybe some women don't mind, maybe some even HOPE you'll ask but I am not one of them. In my first pregnancy I had no idea how to handle this. I was uncomfortable but didn't want to be rude. I'm over that now. I'm not mean about it but if I don't know you I politely say no and walk away. If I know you, then usually I'll say ok...but understand that I would prefer you didn't. 

2. How much weight have you gained? (and other similar questions)

I realize we live in a society that encourages near anorexia and that doesn't seem to go away for a pregnant woman. There is a lot of pressure to only gain a few pounds and then lose it all 5 minutes after delivering. No consideration is taken as to how a woman carries, how big the baby is, etc. We should all be the same, look the same and if you managed to only gain 5 pounds I should be able to do the same too. Any woman who has been pregnant knows this is unfair and yet we judge still. I happen to be one of those people who does not gain a ton of weight during pregnancy. Part of it is that I lose so much in the beginning because I get sick and I get pregnant pretty quick after having a baby so there's always plenty of extra weight to lose. The metabolism boost of another human sucking every calorie that enters my body helps me lose weight too. If I had the metabolism I have when I'm pregnant after I deliver I'd be a stick. Even at my 32 week check up yesterday I was down a pound from my last

visit. But to look at me you would think I am lying. I've included and very unflattering picture of my very pregnant self to prove it (you're welcome!). I'm all belly and look like I've gained 50 lbs when actually I am only 1 lb heavier than I was before I got pregnant. So now that you know please stop asking me how much weight I've gained, if I'm sure it's not twins and if I'm positive the Dr.'s got my due date right. 

3. Are you done having kids?

I'm sure equally inappropriate is the question to those without kids, "when are you going to have kids?" Let me just say that when my family and close friends ask me this question it usually doesn't bother me if it's asked out of genuine wonderment rather than judgment. When the complete stranger ahead of me in the check-out line asks, yes, it bothers me. Whether or not a person is done having kids is not anyone's business. My having kids has no affect on anyone but Ben and I and the kids we already have. We take care of our own. We are not using tax-payer dollars to raise them, we don't outsource them to the grandparents or other family members-we do the work and are not burdening others to help us raise our brood. So really whether or not we will have more should be of no concern to anyone. And it's really no use asking us because we have no idea anyway if we are done or not so usually our answer is vague and uncertain. 

4. How big is your house?

Are you surprised this is even on the list? I am! This pregnancy is the first one where both Ben and I have EVER been asked this question...and on multiple occasions. To me it's in the category of questions like, "how much money do you make?" or "how much did you pay for

your house?". Most people have the etiquette to know you just don't ask those questions. Each time I've been asked I've not been sure what to say. I still don't know what to say. I find it such a strange question to ask. First of all whether or not a house is "big" is usually a subjective thing. What is big to one might not be to another. All I can say is there is room for all of us.

5. You know what causes that right?

Ok so you know the list wouldn't be complete if I didn't add that question because you KNOW we are hearing it often. Just about every time we leave the house. When people say it to try and be funny, I'll laugh along and be a good sport. It's the ones who say it to imply we have been irresponsible that really bother us. And truly more often than not that is the way the question is being presented to us. I don't get nearly as upset about it as Ben does. If there is anything that bothers him its this question! So without exhausting the subject I'll end it with this tip: Its inappropriate to imply ANY pregnancy should not have happened and could/should have been prevented. For a long time I struggled with just the right way to answer...till yesterday. I was reading a blog and the woman had a list of clever answers to this question. My favorite: "yes we do and now I make sure to wash our underwear separately!". LOVE IT! Just don't know I'd have the guts to actually say it!

So there you have it. My list of inappropriate questions to ask a pregnant lady. I'm sure there are others that many of you have encountered...and I'd love to hear them.