To Everything There Is A Season

A Time For Every Purpose Under Heaven

A blog about raising a young family and keeping Christ at the center of it.



The Cyrs

The Cyrs
Photo Credit: Rachel Dewhurst

Thursday, June 14, 2012

A Time to put the Supermom Myth to Rest

I can do all things through Christ who stengthens me.
~Philippians 4:13

In trying to find new and creative activities to keep the kids and I stay busy over summer vacation I came across this blog that had some cute ideas. As I was reading a little bit about the mom behind the blog she had this quote from another mom and called it the "supermom disclaimer" and it reads as follows:

"Doing projects with your kids is NOT what makes someone a good mom! I just happen to find doing crafts with my kids one of my favorite things to do! But many moms don't. That's OKAY. Some of the best moms I know don't enjoy it either. Big deal! They are still amazing moms."
She went on to say in response to that quote:

"I've come to realize that no matter how creative, how fun, how organized, how crafty, etc....
I may be, there is always going to be a mom somewhere in the world who is more anything & everything --- than little ol' me."

And I couldn't have said it better. I have often been given the compliment of "supermom" and while it's a really nice compliment it also makes me feel like a fraud because the last thing I feel like is a supermom. I look around me and see so many amazing moms that I admire, who are so talented and it really makes me feel inadequate. Do you ever feel that way?

 Well one thing I know for sure is that God has made each of us differently with our own set of abilities, strengths, talents, gifts, weaknesses, etc. so that our parenting is going to be so different. While there are the moms that make all their food and clothing and toys from scratch and stay away from modern medicine and know what each and every herb's name and function are there are also the moms who take their kids hiking and camping and to the beach every weekend and do all the yardwork and love gardening and exercise 8 days a week. There are the moms who are more comfortable at home and fill their children's minds with information & books, they homeschool and always have just the right thing to say for any given situation and know all the greatest games and crafts to do with their kids. Then you have the working mom who is also raising kids and on the PTO and lets her kids do any activity their little heart desires because she doesn't think twice about being on the road all day, who also throws the biggest and best birthday parties, and is the first to volunteer in the classroom or for the fundraiser. Or maybe you are like me and you are none of these but rather a modge podge of each, a little of this a little of that and hoping you don't mess up too much along the way. I admire moms who sew because I can't. I admire moms who have a technical mind to build things because I don't. I admire moms who are creative and have the best birthday party themes and ideas and make it so fun for the kids because I struggle to pull this off.Then I realize that even if I could do many of the things that I admire in others it doesn't mean I would have time to do them because with 5 kids and one on the way things are busy here and I have to be very organized with my time if I want to get anything done. In this season of my life there is very little room for "extras". Maybe that is one thing you admire about me, I don't know. I am organized, I can say that, and it is something that comes naturally to me and I believe it's a gift I've been given of God. Good thing too because when Ben and I started out on this journey we never thought we'd be having our 6th baby. But God knew, because He knows everything and over the years He has helped me to develop the skills I would need to handle a family of this size. And He's still teaching and molding me because I have not arrived. I am daily finding my "superpowers" in God's power. My strength and ability to function comes from Him. I find it in His word, which refuels me every day and I find it in the power of prayer, knowing that with each joy, trial, and challenge He is right there waiting for me to cry out to Him or praise Him, whichever the moment requires. Without God I could not face each day with the joy and peace and willingness to raise the family I have. My human flesh is too weak. So if that is what makes me a "supermom" then okay, I guess I am, but I'm only super in God's power....Praise the Lord I have it available to me.

So the next time you find yourself comparing your self to other moms, or judging other moms for not raising her kids the same way you are or finding the same joy and excitement you are while doing it, remember that you can only "do things through Christ" because He is the source of our ability, strength and power,and He alone gives peace and joy whether you believe it or not. Do what I do and try to find within yourself the gifts and abilities God has given you and realize those are the exact things God wanted you to have and all you'll need to do what He's asked of you... He is not asking you to be like "so and so" He's asking you to be who He created you to be. And if you find season's in life where you have time to learn some new skills well then that's just an added bonus! But know that God's intent was for all of us to be supermoms, we just need to know where to go to get our power!

5 comments:

  1. AnonymousJune 14, 2012

    Love it! When i was pregnant with my first I had many lofty ideas and hard and fast rule for raising my child. I compared all the time, adding to my list of things I "should" do. And if I'm honest...judged others who didn't do it my way. Of course i still wrestle with comparison and judgement but I'm slowly but surely learning not to sweat the small stuff, to be the mom God created me to be and look to him for what's important and to support and love other moms regardless of whether their methods are the same as mine. I'm sure each additional child brings more and more opportunities for these lessons, so here's to some upcoming growth!
    Sarah

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  2. Great post! We can't do everything well, but with God's power, we can do a few things well. Those "things" are different for each of us. I really wish I was one of the organized moms though. ;-)

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  3. what a great post! You really hit the nail on the head.
    Thanks for the reminder and the encouragement.

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  4. Sarah, I can relate to what you say because I was exactly the same when I had my first. As we added more to our family I realized that my standard and expectations would have to be altered and that I was going to need to learn grace because I still had so much to learn! And I think as moms, we all struggle on some level with comparing ourselves and judging other moms. The important thing is to recognize it and work on not doing it! :)

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